And that’s all I’ve heard.
So, apparently I took the proverbial nerd bullet and was the one person in the entire god-forsaken world that read Blue Beetle.
And now YOU have to read my review. Take that.
Nobody’s going to read this are they…
I don’t read DC.
But I like Batman.
I’m told that he doesn’t count though.
I’m also told that this reboot thing didn’t even affect him.
That means I bought the new Batman that came out this week. Thought I’d give this whole “DC” thing a try. Turns out Batman was pretty good. I liked it. And since the fabulous “Tardy’s Collector Corner” (blatant product placement) was having a buy 3 get 1 free for all new DC comics and since my copy of Batman was my roommates 7th DC comic of the week, I told him to grab me a free copy of Blue Beetle.
Here’s some names on the cover. I don’t know who any of them are, what they’ve done, and I won’t be bothered to check inside the comic to see what they did on Blue Beetle.
- Tony Bedard
- Ig Guara
- Ruy José
So how was it?
Here’s this simple version. I thought I’d get this:
But instead I got this…
Overall, Blue Beetle was decent. You will never get a single character’s last name and you have to be able to read Spanish via context clues to understand everything that’s being said but all-in-all… it was okay. I was horribly disappointed by the lack of Iron-Man-esque ass-kicking to be had. Instead I got a lot of middle-school angst and drama.
I guess it was a good introductory issue, but I still found myself confused at times as to what was going on and who the hell any of the bad guys were. I swear that at one point Kirkman’s Wolfman and a cross between Archangel and a UFO were fighting a pile of puke and a guy in a Haz-Mat suit.
Oh, and for the one Blue Beetle fanboy out there in the world that was excited about this: Don’t. He doesn’t turn into Blue Beetle until the last panel on the last page. The cover was a lie.
This is not to say it was all bad though. The prologue is shown here:
It was the one good thing that happened in this comic. It was four pages of someone (unexplained) tearing up a planet in a Blue Beetle costume. And then apparently this other beetle guy that’s also blue tells hims that he’s killing his own people. But the first guy doesn’t care anymore because now he’s a member of the Blue Beetles or something and they are evil.
Reboot my ass. If I wanted a reboot, I’d get this:
Nothing was explained but at least I got to see some sort of cyborg man who I will never see again because THE ENTIRE GODDAMN PROLOGUE TOOK PLACE FOUR THOUSAND YEARS AGO kick ass.
And then a green lantern showed up.
So who the **** reads Blue Beetle?
Let’s keep it that way.
**** you DC. And **** your reboots.