Because we know everyone loved part 1 of our series here, we have more rants and speculations and other types of talks for the upcoming movies (and some not-so-upcoming) of the summer. Do enjoy, dear readers.
This discussion will cover the following movies:

Take a leap and continue on.

Green LanternGreen Lantern

Mike
Filed under Movies I know something about: Let’s not lie here. I’m going to see this damn movie. Despite Ryan Reynolds, despite the CGI-sex-leotard, despite the ugly mask, despite my not knowing anything jack squat about Green Lantern other than what I saw in Green Lantern: First Flight, I am going to see this movie. I’m so torn about whether or not this movie is going to tank that I can’t think about it without wanting to tear my hair out. On one hand, we have some decent casts for roles (according to some of my fellow writers/nerd friends), but then we have… everything possible in this world going against it. A little known director, a team of writers who all appear to be hit-or-miss types, low expectations for CGI, too much CGI, Blake Lively, and people like me who are predisposed to dislike this movie for no good reason. I don’t have high hopes.
Expected Rating: 4.5/10

Ryan
Filed under Movies I Don’t Want to See But Will Anyway: Oh man…. as much as I don’t like Captain America, I hate Green Lantern one hundred times more. I’m sorry, he’s not a dynamic character and the fact that he’s being played by Ryan Reynolds doesn’t add any character depth or development. Plus the whole Green Lantern superpower has never really gelled with me. The lazy physics/explanation of the green lantern powers  always seemed like something a six year old thought up. Now to the film.. the CGI looks like a video game at best and downright horrible at its worst. The plot and characters are about as strong as cardboard. The only redeeming quality of it is maybe Blake Lively. (I mean Gossip Girl aside. She was pretty decent in The Town) However like Jonah Hex and Josh Brolin  of last year one good actor won’t turn a cinematic turd into gold no matter how hard he/she try.
Expected Rating: 3/10

Dan
Intend to See:
Huge GL fan, but not sure how well it’s going to work as a movie. Also just a tad peeved that the role went to Ryan Reynolds instead of Bradley Cooper.

Kevin
The year of all things green continues with the Green Lantern, the highly-anticipated for DC fanboys. For Warner Brothers/DC wanting this film to be their next big franchise, there is a lot working against this movie. I have no desire to see this film, in all honesty. The CG looks pretty poor, as the suit looks awful and the lantern effects from the trailers look lousy as well and even though the cast of this film is pretty impressive, I don’t know or care to know much about the characters they are playing to make t worth my time. On a more personal note, I am holding a grudge against this film because it has prevented Ryan Reynolds from starting work on the Deadpool movie, and I’m fairly certain WB/DC are intentionally doing this. Fanboy rant aside, I have the feeling this movie will do Thor type money and will be met with decent reviews. Just not from me.

Nick
Fair warning: I’m a big Green Lantern fan, so this may be bias. I believe that this film is going to be a lot like Thor: it seems impossible to make this movie good, yet somehow they are going to pull it off. Green Lantern is fairly complex, and it’s not until you involve the corps that you really get a great story out of the characters. If this movie was just Hal Jordan flying around Earth fighting crime, this movie would fail. But the last trailer has shown that the filmmakers really want to throw in everything that makes GL great. Fans will probably rejoice over this film, but it’s really a question whether mainstream audiences will enjoy it. Whenever you involve spacey stuff, you are in danger of alienating your audience into thinking this is only a sci-fi film. But with the recent success of geeky movies, I think that mainstream audiences are starting to be ok with a little sci-fi mixed in with their good stories and action.

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

Mike
Filed under Movies I have a vague idea about: Who cares? I didn’t even bother trying to watch the first movie… I know enough to say I know something about it, but who gives a damn? …flame head…
Thoughts: I don’t even care

Ryan
Filed under Movies That I Want to Avoid at All Costs!: This original is right up with the worst of Nic Cage’s movies for me. Do I really need to say anything more?
Final Thoughts: The only way I would see this movie is if somebody paid me to do it. Even if Cage isn’t in it, not a real big fan of the Ghost Rider character, and I’m super gun-shy of a Ghost Rider sequel after how the first one bombed.

Dan
Don’t expect to see in my lifetime

Kevin
I fell asleep about a third of the way into the first Ghost Rider film and didn’t bother to rewatch the rest of that one, so I do not think I while have anything to do with this future train wreck as well. I mean, when the only thing your film has going for it is that Idris “Heimdall” Elba is in it, you know that the film is doomed. That is not even adding Nicolas Cage and the fact that this sequel needs TWO directors to handle it. As one dopey Imperial Stormtrooper once wisely said, “Move along….Move along!”.

Nick
Never saw the first, won’t see this one. Also, we can chalk this movie up on the list of movies that I really don’t think will see the light of day.

Transformers: Dark of the MoonTransformers: Dark of the Moon

Mike
Filed under Movies I have no clue about: I don’t think I have to say much about this one. I saw Transformers 2 in theatres for free last time and I wanted to knock myself unconcious about 20 minutes in–having not seen Transformers at the time, I wanted to at least try to understand what was happening. This movie I won’t even bother with. Like Ghost Rider 2, I just don’t care, but at least I don’t know much outside of the name of the movie.
Mind Spit: I hate explosions thanks to Michael Bay

Ryan
Filed under Movies I Don’t Want to See But Will Anyway: Believe or not back in 2007 I thought Transformers was a halfway decent movie. If you’re looking for formulaic characters, plot, and warm nostalgic feelings of the Transformers cartoons and toys you could do worse. Plus the original Transformers  Michael Bay introduced me to Megan Fox and I’ll be slightly grateful for that. Then Revenge of the Fallen insulted me with its downright stupidity, while at the same time taking itself way too seriously as shown with its ridiculously long running time (150 mins!), and at times the film was downright racist ! You know Dark of The Moon is in trouble when only 5 lines have shown up in the trailer and the rest of it is a helter-skleter mess of CGI robots fighting. I’m hoping to avoid seeing this film in theaters.
Expected Rating 4/10

Dan
No Interest In Seeing: Loathed the first film, didn’t bother with the second, so count me out.

Kevin
I think from the majority of my reviews for the site show my opinion of director/lazy hack Michael Bay, but just in case you are unaware: I hate him. He represents everything that is wrong with filmmaking, and the Transformers franchise is the perfect example of how soulless summer films have become. To be honest, I was never a big fan of anything Transformers. Never watched the cartoons, never really played with the toys, and when I did I wanted to beat myself to death with them because I couldn’t figure them out. Even with those factors in mind, I still feel awful for Transformers fans. They deserve better than this franchise has given them, especially the train wreck that was Revenge of the Fallen. On the plus side, Megan Fox is gone, but all that means is they replaced her with some other wooden blow-up doll to run in slow-motion while Shia LaBeouf shouts character names. But this all doesn’t matter because I do not plan on ever seeing this film. Ever. Ever.

Nick
There’s really no chance I will subject myself to seeing this in theaters. I’m sure I will eventually get around to getting this on Netflix and will hate myself for the whole 2+ hours of what is sure to be another crapfest. Why do I watch it, you ask? Because in order to hate something, you must first experience it. This is why I have watched all the Twilight movies. I can’t publicly criticize something that I haven’t seen. Seriously though, it is going to suck. I just hope it doesn’t suck as much as the second movie.

Deadpool

Mike
Filed under Movies I have a vague idea about: The fleeting Deadpool movie… There are so many rumors going around this albatross of a movie that I don’t even know what to say. Will Ryan Reynolds be back? Is he all DC now because of Green Lantern? Who knows? Fox probably does and they’re ready to suck blood again like they did with the Wolverine movie… dicks.
Thoughts: If this happens and goes badly, I may start setting buildings on fire out of madness.

Ryan
Filed under Movies I Want to See in Theaters: I’ll most likely give a Deadpool movie a chance. After the way that character was butchered in Wolverine I feel that Hollywood can’t make it any worse.
Expected Rating N.A. Too Soon To Tell, but Mildly Interested in seeing

Dan
Don’t expect to see in my lifetime.

Kevin
This little blurb is going to be a very hard one for me to do without me mentioning my crazed conspiracy theory that Warner Brothers and DC are conspiring against this movie, so I will just go ahead and say it. With Ryan Reynolds as Hal Jordan, WB/DC got more than they ever dreamed so that they could screw over Marvel and their plans to make a movie about one of their fanboys (myself included) most popular characters: Deadpool. With WB already having writers creating a script for Green Lantern 2, without the first even being released yet I may add, it looks as if they are going to continue trying to box Marvel out and hope that Ryan Reynolds finally decides to drop the project. That said, Ryan Reynolds is also partially to blame because he keeps saying “Yes” to every damn role that is offered to him, as if he is trying to break Jude Law and Morgan Freeman’s record of being in every single film in a one-year span. However, since there is a script and a director attached to the project in Tim Miller, the film will happen with Reynolds’ involvement or not. The question is will it actually be good or not and that is a question I fear I may have the answer to, and I hope that I am wrong.

Nick
Yeah, unless someone actually tells me this is decent, I’m not going to waste my time. After they absolutely destroyed the character in Wolverine: Origins (along with the rest of the X-Men), I’m not going to bother. My only hope is that they don’t use the Deadpool from that movie and relaunch the character. I won’t hold my breath. Not to mention, I still don’t think this movie is going to come out at all.

Conan the BarbarianConan the Barbarian

Mike
Filed under Movies I have no idea about: Since when have people been interested in Conan the Barbarian? Why would making this movie even be a good idea? I have to wonder what Dark Horse’s place in all of this? or Avatar Press? or Arnold Schwarzenegger’s? There are too many questions to even want to begin answering.
Mind Spit: For some reason, my mind always goes to Lothar of the Hillpeople when I see the title of this movie/comic.

Ryan
Filed under Movies I Want To Avoid At All Costs!: I guess Hollywood has truly hit the bottom of the barrel.  Who sits at the studio meeting and goes:

  • Guy Number 1: “Hey you know what would be a good movie franchise to reboot”
  • Guy Number 2: “No what?”
  • Guy Number 1: “Let’s reboot Conan the barbarian”
  • Guy Number 2 “That’s a great idea!”

Its at that point where I would come in a punch both guys out.
Final Thoughts: Now that Arnold is in all this hot water and will lose half of his money would he star in the long promised sequel to Conan the Destroyer? Now I would see that!

Dan
Intend to see.

Kevin
Admittedly, I have never seen a Conan movie. I am not a big Arnold fan, and this films in general never offered anything interesting to me. That being said, I have no plans to see this. Even if I had a hint of excitement for it, the terrible teaser trailer was more than enough to kill it, as I have seen fan trailers that looked better. This has all the makings of a bad movie: it is directed by Marcus Nispel, who has directed the bomb Pathfinder and the forgettable Friday the 13th and Texas Chainsaw Massacre reboots; the cast is weak beyond Ron Pearlman (who has a reputation for being in really shitty films) and Rose McGowan, who I am sure will just be reduced to eye candy (wait…how is that a bad thing?). As for our new Conan? Well, he looks like he is the same species of alien that Tom Hardy disguises himself as in Inception, and while I am sure the role of Conan probably will not need too much acting ability, I am expecting less. I have better things to spend my money on than this film, and I think the majority of the movie-going public will feel the same way.

Nick
I can’t believe we are even discussing this movie… zero interest.

Aren’t we just bitter folks? Stay tuned for our final installment soon!

About The Author

Mike is currently the Editor-in-Chief at DestroyTheCyborg! as well as a full time web developer for Comixology in New York. He's a die-hard X-Men fan whose love of Gambit will stand the test of time.

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